A day at the (security) theater

[arib]

This morning, I went to the Tip O'Neill Federal Building so I could get a duplicate Social Security card. (My original card was in a wallet that was stolen when I lived in Israel back in 1998. Stupid of me, I know...)

Since it was a government building there was the standard metal detector and bag scanning device. As usual, I resigned myself to the extra hassle of standing on line, emptying my pockets, and getting ready to walk through the arch.

Unlike previous trips, I had my daughter with me.

To wit, I have the following observations to make:

1. When you tell me "leave the stroller with your child in it, walk through the metal detector, then come back and get the stroller when we've cleared you," you can bet your sweet ass that I'm going to walk through that arch backwards, never taking my eyes off of my child.*

2. After getting cleared, I walked back through the arch, retrieved RAB, wheeled her through the arch in her stroller, and went about my business. The stroller made the arch beep, given that it's primarily made of metal. Nobody bothered to stop me or check the stroller or my daughter in any appreciable way.

3. The metal parts of the stroller are hollow. Anybody who's desperate and stupid enough could get a stroller, pack the hollow bits full of whatever contraband you want (C4 and a detonator, gun parts, flash drives containing videos of Glenn Beck, whatever), and wheel it right in.

4. The combination of points 2 and 3 make the whole "empty your pockets, place all bags on the belt, and walk through this dingus" thing absolutely pointless.


I just can't wait until we fly or travel internationally with my kid in tow, I'm sure it'll be just as educational.


*To the guard's credit, he stood right next to the stroller, didn't let anyone else come near it, and actually made smiley faces at my kid. I suspect he realizes how incredibly uncomfortable that request must make people feel.

Comments

[cellio]

Wow, I would have assumed that the protocol would be to have an adult carry the child through the scanner and then inspect (or send through) the stroller separately.

[mick-hale.livejournal.com]

In airports, that's the protocol, usually.

[elul-3.livejournal.com]

What he said. And as soon as the kids are old enough to walk on their own, airport security usually wants you to have them go through the scanner by themselves. Fine with two parents present, reeeeeeeeeeeeeally not a safe idea with only one parent there.

[mick-hale.livejournal.com]

When we went traveling with our (then 1y7m) twins last September, we only had one case of them running away after they walked through the security checkpoint. It was well worth the laugh. Luckily it was Toronto and not New York, because it would be a lot less humourous to the security guards.

[llennhoff.livejournal.com]

you can bet your sweet ass that I'm going to walk through that arch backwards, never taking my eyes off of my child

Were you expecting the government to snatch her and take her to a reeducation camp, or some random crazy lady who lost her child to run off with her, or what exactly? For someone who talks about 'security theater' you certainly seem to have concocted your own version of Movie Plot Thread syndrome.

[elul-3.livejournal.com]

Any number of other random people could have walked by the stroller while Ari was walking through. And if he set off the metal detector and triggered a more intense personal screening, he would have been separated from RAB for a longer period of time and possibly moved to where she was outside his field of vision. Choice then is to make a scene resisting security screening procedures, or leave your child in the "care" of a stranger.

If a parent walked away from his infant like this in a crowded public place under almost any other circumstances, we would consider it irresponsible.

[llennhoff.livejournal.com]

If they wanted him to be moved to a separate screening area I certainly see insisting the child come along. I'm not worried about the 'number of other random people' who walked by the stroller when Ari walked through the scanner. I think it is a bad thing for society that you both are worried, which is why I made the comment to begin with.

[arib.livejournal.com]

Hardly. It's not that I honestly expected anything to happen at all. That said, it's a lot to ask a person to do, especially for a security procedure of dubious usefulness.

[vettecat.livejournal.com]

That does seem odd. I'd think either you'd roll her through, or carry her through while they checked the stroller.

[lucretia-borgia.livejournal.com]

I will note that several years ago I walked into the courthouse downtown for jury duty. I put my shoulder bag on the belt, walked through the metal detector, retrieved my bag, and reported to the jury queue.

Hours later I realized that my multitool, which includes a not-so-small and quite sharp knife, was in my bag the whole time.