(no subject)

[arib]

Argh!



So, I'm trapped in a car with three of my co-workers for half an hour as we drive downtown for a job-training, and the following responses kept springing to mind. (The names have been changed to protect the moronic.)

To all:

Bitching about the boss while we drive is one thing, doing it with a client in the car is counter-productive and dangerous.

M:

Please learn how to impart details of a conversation without replaying the entire conversation, an example follows...

me: "I spoke with Bob this afternoon about scheduling a dental appointment, he told me that he'd need to see if he could get off work that Thursday."

M: "So I said 'Bob, you need to go to the dentist!' and Bob said 'But, but., but, M, I have to go to work.' and then I said 'Bob, that's okay, you can call your boss and let her know you'll be late thatday.' Then he said 'I already missed work last week, I can't do it again.' Then I said..."

and so on, and so on, ad infinitum, ad nauseum.

Also, please stop smoking in the car, it's not your car, and these aren't your lungs, you've already been told off by the boss about this.

S:

Ordinarily, I have no problems with S, she's one of the best people I've ever worked with, and is damned good at what she does. On the other hand, when the boss has mentioned this training at every staff meeting for the past month, don't complain that you didn't know and couldn't schedule things with your other job...

and finally...

Z:

Reapeat after me:

There is no Illuminati, nor any other secret government conspiracy out to control the world's governments, replace money with smartchips thatare implanted in our heads "Mark of the Beast" style, and arrest people who belong to organized religion.

fnord, he said in jest/.

Furthermore, I'm not a member of this group, just because I'm Jewish. I don't have contacts in the show-business industry, and I will not help get your records published. For one thing, your music's crap. If you wantme toget technical, it's simplistic, derivative, and is full of so much sampling that it borders on copyright infringement. For another I don't think any company of any stripe should hire you because of your complete and utter lack of any sort of work-ethic.

You just don't get it. Our clients aren't just poor shlubs who got caught by "the system." (controlled by his fucking shadow government, I'm sure,) and are being oppressed by "the Man." They're severely mentally ill and, with one exception, were all homeless before entering our program. We're helping them you stupid fuck, and you're too caught up in your stupid fantasy land to do anything. You should be fired as soon as possible, and shouldn't be involved in this field at all, unless it's as a patient.

Don't even get me started on our religious differences. I don't love Jesus, please deal.

In my belief system, you're not Jewish. You're a member of a Judeo-Christian based bible-cult, and if you mention how we'll be hanging out in heaven after the Rapture one more time, I'll scream and throw things.

I'm very glad the van had lumbar support doo-dahs, as it gave me something to punch rather than sombody's head.

Y'know, I'm feeling much calmer now. Catharsis is neat.

Comments

[eleri.livejournal.com]

Don't kill your cow-orkers until after you come visit me. Love you!

[browngirl.livejournal.com]

Argh indeed.

*gentle hug*

A.

[cellio]

Next time, you drive. That way you've got the airbag. The rest is left as an exercise for the reader. :-)

[nsingman.livejournal.com]

There is no Illuminati, nor any other secret government conspiracy out to control the world's governments, replace money with smartchips thatare implanted in our heads "Mark of the Beast" style, and arrest people who belong to organized religion.

That's just what we want you to think. Heh, heh, heh . . .

:-)